How to Get Your Aging Parent Moving on Elder Care

It’s hard enough to work up the courage to talk to an elderly loved one about their plans for the future, and particularly what their wishes would be if they were no longer able to care for themselves. Things get even tougher if they refuse to answer questions or participate in the discussion.

And yet, it’s entirely understandable that your relative would want to avoid these topics. No one wants to think about getting older or facing the end of life. And for many, the thought of having someone else decide where they will live or how their money will be spent is even worse.

This can leave a senior citizen’s loved ones in a difficult spot. On the one hand, they don’t want to argue or pester a person who has cared for them their entire lives. But on the other hand, they really do need to make contingency plans for the future.

If this sounds familiar and you are trying to think ahead for someone else’s care, here are a few ways you can get them to join the conversation…

Help Them Understand That “No Decision” Is a Decision

Deciding you don’t want to think about getting older won’t stop it from happening. In fact, the only thing that will change is that you’re facing the same kinds of difficulties everyone else does without any kind of plan for dealing with them.

When your aging parent ignores the future, they put themselves in a situation where a stranger (like a judge or administrator) will decide the details of their life for them. That’s probably not the outcome they want.

Remind Them That You Are on Their Side

While the aforementioned judge, lawyer, or social worker might not care about your relative, you do. You can take the time to understand what’s important to them, walk through different possibilities, and create strategies that balance their needs with reality.

This kind of planning is never enjoyable, but it’s much better to go through it with a trusted loved one by your side to look out for your best interests.

Help Them Break Down Some Stereotypes

In some cases, seniors don’t want to think about the future because they might imagine that their only option is to live in a nursing home. Not only that, but they may be envisioning a type of facility or living arrangement that represents the worst of the worst.

Assuming you have some time to plan ahead, you can help them break out of those stereotypes and outdated ideas. They might not know it, but seniors can live in active and enjoyable communities that didn’t exist even a couple of decades ago.

Looking for More Real-World Elder Care Advice?

When I first started learning about elder care it wasn’t because I wanted to write a book. I was just looking for ways to help my mom and dad live a comfortable life from thousands of miles away. What I ended up with was a system of ideas that can be used by anyone facing a similar situation.

To learn more about my experiences, or to get help creating a plan for your elderly loved one that actually makes sense, ORDER YOUR COPY TODAY. 

Since you’re here…

… I have a small favor to ask. If you enjoyed reading this article, I’d be glad if you share it with your friends on Social Media. Maybe they will be interested in reading this content too!

order button

Related Posts

Leave A Comment

The Elder Care Playbook Paperback

Buy now!

This invaluable book on eldercare is available on Amazon.

order button

Recent Posts

Recommended for you:

The items you find here have been carefully selected.

EATWELL ~ A tableware set for the mentally or eyesight impaired

The user-centered design helps to increase food intake and maintain dignity for its users, while also helping to alleviate caring burdens by making the process of eating as easy as possible.


This is not your granny's walker!

This walker is a bit pricey but the steering and rolling comfort makes it easy to use. Note: most people push it like a shopping cart. That is wrong. The correct way is to stand upright and not lean forward. If you don't know how to use it have a nurse show you.


Connect with your Loved One

My mother considers Alexa her 'friend'. She says she feels safer since she has her in her room.


Small Changes ~ Big Impact

When you are constantly feeling overwhelmed and unable to change then read this book. It helped me and I would be surprised if it didn't help you.

When you make a purchase I receive a tiny fee.